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It’s that season when the leaves turn red, the air gets a little chilly at night, and people start looking for pumpkin pie ingredients everywhere. Yes, it’s Halloween time! And what better way to celebrate than by reading some hilarious Halloween jokes? We’ve collected 100 of the best jokes for your enjoyment. So put on your favorite costume, grab a pumpkin spice latte, and enjoy these funny one-liners!
Table of Contents
Wickedly- Funny Halloween Dad Jokes
A good Halloween dad joke brings out the best laughs and chuckles from the people you love the most. Here are Halloween dad jokes that will do just that!
Q1: What do you call a skeleton with a sense of humor?
A1: A funny bone
Q2: How do ghosts like their eggs?
A2: A little spooked!
Q3: How do you fix a jack-o-lantern?
A3: With a pumpkin patch!
Q4. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A4. A blood orange!
Q5. What does a mummy use to make his bed?
A5. A shroud!
Q6: What’s a skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?
A6. A trombone!
Q7: What did the ghost say to the other ghost?
A7: Do you believe in people?
Q8. What kind of streets do zombies like the best?
A8. Dead ends!
Q9: What do you call two witches living together?
A9: Broom mates!
Q10: Why did the witch cross the road?
A10: To get to the other side!
Q11: What do you call a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Q12: What’s a witch’s favorite animal?
A12: A black cat!
Q13: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Q14: Why did the zombie go to the therapist?
A14: He was having trouble with his ghouls!
Q15: What’s a witch’s favorite type of cheese?
Q16: What do you call a group of ghosts?
A16: A haunting!
Q17: What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?
Q18: What do you call a witch who can’t make up her mind?
A18: A wishy-washy witch!
Q19: What do you get when you cross a vampire and do a homework assignment?
A19: A blood test!
Q20: What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Exciting Kids Halloween jokes
Do you want to make your kids’ Halloween memorable? What better way to do it than by making them laugh with spooky yet hilarious Halloween jokes!
Here are funny Halloween jokes for kids:
Q1: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A1: He had no guts!
Q2: What do ghosts eat for dinner?
Q3: How do you fix a broken pumpkin?
A3: With a pumpkin patch!
Q4: What did the policeman say to his belly?
A4: You’re under a vest!
Q5: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
A5: Spare ribs!
Q6: Why did the chicken go to the seance?
A6: To get to the other side!
Q7: Why don’t ghosts like parties?
A7: They prefer scares!
Q8: Where do ghosts buy their food?
A8: At the I Scream store!
Q9: What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?
A9: Dead ends!
Q10: What is a ghost’s favorite fruit?
Q11: How do you catch a witch?
A11: Tie a sheet of paper to her back!
Q12: How do ghosts fly?
A12: They take the Scareway!
Q13: What is a ghost’s favorite mode of transportation?
A13: The scary-go-round!
Q14: What is a vampire’s favorite vegetable?
Q15: What fruit do scarecrows love most?
A15: Plums, because they’re prunes without the “p!”
Q16: How do you know when a vampire has been in your house?
A16: The garbage is gone, and there’s a bite on the couch!
Q17: What do you call a skeleton in the closet?
A17: A bone to pick!
Q18: What room does a ghost not need?
A18: A living room!
Q19: What’s a mummy’s favorite type of music?
Q20: What’s a ghost’s favorite color?
Q21: What does a witch use to comb her hair?
A21: A scare-comb!
Q22: How do you make a witch itch?
A22: Take away her W!
Q23: Why are ghosts, such bad liars?
A23: Because they are easy to see through!
Q24: Why did zombies skip school?
A24: Because they were tired of the living dead!
Q25: What did the skeleton say to the bartender?
A25: Give me a beer and a mop!
Q26: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A26: Day-scare centers!
Q27: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
A27: A hobbling ghost!
Q28: Why are ghosts, such bad drivers?
A28: They have no eyesight!
Q29: What do you call a vampire who travels by airplane?
A29: A bloodsucker!
Q30: What is a ghost’s nose full of?
Q31: What kind of candy do ghosts like?
A31: Chocolate bars because they’re easy to bite into!
Q32: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton?
A32: I’m bored of these bones!
Q33: How do ghosts haunt people?
A33: They give them the boos!
Q34: What is a ghost’s favorite type of cheese?
A34: Brie-ing ghosts!
Q35: What does the evil hen lay?
A35: Deviled eggs!
Q36: What is a vampire’s favorite type of blood?
A36: Type A!
Halloween knock-knock jokes
Knock-knock jokes never get old. And what’s better for Halloween than a good scare? These Halloween knock-knock jokes are sure to do the trick.
A Dracula knock-knock joke
No need to be alarmed. It’s just me, Dracula!
A mummy knock-knock joke
I don’t know. I’ve been wrapped up in this joke for years!
A Frankenstein knock-knock joke
Frankenstein doesn’t need knock-knock jokes; he just scares people!
A zombie knock-knock joke
Ugh, I don’t know. I’m just a zombie!
A Witch knock-knock joke
No, no, no! You’re supposed to say “witch”! Now I’ll have to turn you into a frog!
A skeleton knock-knock joke
I don’t know; I’ve been dead for so long!
A ghost knock-knock joke
Boo! Did I scare you? I’m just a friendly ghost!
A vampire knock-knock joke
No need to be afraid. I just want to suck your blood!
A werewolf knock-knock joke
Grr! I’m a werewolf! Don’t make me angry!
An ogre knock-knock joke
Ogres don’t need knock-knock jokes; they just eat people!
A pumpkin knock-knock joke
No need to be scared; I’m just a harmless pumpkin!
An alien knock-knock joke
Take me to your leader! I come in peace!
A black cat knock-knock joke
Black cat, who?
No need to be afraid. I’m just a black cat!
A bat knock-knock joke
No need to be afraid. I’m just a bat!
A spider knock-knock joke
No need to be afraid. I’m just a spider!
A devil knock-knock joke
No need to be afraid; I’m just a devil!
Funny Halloween jokes(Vampire Jokes, Witch Jokes, Pumpkin Jokes)
Crack up this Halloween with our collection of funny Halloween jokes. These spooky jokes are perfect for kids and adults alike.
Vampires scare people. But these vampire jokes are so funny; they’ll surely get the laughter right out of you!
Q1: What do you call a vampire who only drinks decaf?
A1: A bloodsucker that can’t handle the caffeine!
Q2: Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?
A2: He wanted to improve his bite!
Q3: What do you call a vampire who’s scared of garlic?
A3: A wimp!
Witches are not always old and ugly. Some of them are young and beautiful. But they all have one thing in common: they love to play tricks on people. Here are some witch jokes to make you laugh this Halloween:
Q1: What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A1: A sand witch!
Q2: Why did the witch run out of shampoo?
A2: She ran out of spells!
Q3: How does a witch tell time?
A3: By the witches’ clock!
Q4: What do you call a witch’s pet?
A4. A familiar!
Q5: Why did the witch go to the doctor?
A5: She had a spell!
Q6: What do you call a witch’s husband?
A6. A warlock
Pumpkin jokes are the perfect way to get into the Halloween spirit. Here are pumpkin jokes that will make you laugh out loud.
Q1: What do you call a pumpkin that’s a magician?
A1: A wizard gourd!
Q2: What do you call two pumpkins sitting on each other?
A2: Double trouble!
Q3: How does a pumpkin feel when he’s sick?
Q4: What do you call a pumpkin that’s been in the sun too long?
A4: A raisin!
Q5: Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor?
A5: He was feeling a bit squashy!
That’s all, folks! We hope you enjoyed our list of 100 plus Halloween jokes. With these classics in your repertoire, you’ll definitely be the life of any Halloween party. And, if you’re looking for more Halloween fun, you can play some Halloween party games, make some tasty Halloween treats, or try your hand at making a Halloween costume. Whatever you do, have fun and enjoy the holiday!